The old saying “maria goes with the others” is the easiest way to define those who spend more time trying to be like others, instead of being an authentic person . But this can happen for countless reasons, such as social pressure, the need to fit into standards or even difficulty recognizing and accepting oneself as one is.
But authenticity, above all, is a person’s ability to be faithful to their truth, and put honesty at the forefront of their way of living, whether in friendship circles, family or work.
But just look at social media to see people following certain standards, whether in the aesthetics of the images, in the places they frequent and even in their appearance. Even app filters inspire people to be like each other. And with the digital presence so strong in our lives, it can be difficult to understand what characteristics make you a unique person.
Because being authentic does not necessarily mean being different from others. It is not necessary for a person to choose the opposite of what everyone is doing, that is, to be “against” to be considered authentic, but rather to live their own truth, not betraying themselves.
How do I know if I’m authentic?
The simplest way to understand whether a person is authentic is to take stock of how they see themselves and how they are seen by others. Also analyze how much you do or say things just to please others. Far from being a characteristic of a “suck-up”, this behavior can indicate the need to please, the difficulty in saying what you really think or showing what you really like.
But these characteristics are essential for an authentic person, as we will see later in this text. For now, try to see if you are an authentic person by answering the questions below:
As we can see, this personality characteristic is complex and requires self-knowledge. When answering the questions above you need to be honest with yourself. And this is one of the main challenges in becoming someone authentic.
How to be a more authentic person?
The first attitude a person needs to take to live their most authentic version, then, is to be honest with themselves. This means looking inside and identifying, in addition to the qualities, the defects as well.
Therefore, the number one characteristic of an authentic person is honesty. Only someone who is honest with themselves is capable of transmitting truth to others, and reflecting this in their way of living.
But be careful, being honest doesn’t mean going around saying everything you think and risking disrespecting and upsetting other people. Honesty happens through the sincere way of expressing yourself, making it clear what you like or don’t like.
It is common for people to stop sharing their opinion for fear of how they will be seen, or just in the name of cordiality. Whether because we don’t want to hurt someone we love, or to maintain a balance with co-workers, we may fail to express our honest opinion.
But this prevents the bonds with the people we interact with from becoming stronger, as they will never know exactly who we are. At work, it can even impede professional development.
Authenticity has nothing to do with being extroverted, attracting attention from others or being the center of attention. Authentic people can be shy, dress traditionally and discreetly and have few (and good) friends.
Authenticity is not in wearing different clothes, although this may be a trait of each person’s individuality, but in being original within one’s own standards. This means comparing yourself less with others, and living more how you are happy. To do this, you need to stop worrying about the judgment of others and, above all, avoid comparisons.
Know how to change
Being authentic does not mean always being the same person. The experiences we face in life, the places we know, the people we live with, all of this affects our perception of the world and ourselves. Therefore, knowing how to change, whether in opinion, style or region, is also part of being authentic.
In fact, a person who is stuck with characteristics that they believe make them authentic can lose this trait, as over time it no longer seems like a singularity.